I Survived by Victoria Cilliers

Rating:

5 Stars

Themes:

True Crime, Coercive Control, Non-Fiction, Memoir, Abuse, Biography

Thoughts:

This can be a difficult read at sometimes but is a critical book for anyone who wants or needs to understand coercive control and abusive relationships. It’s all too easy for us to see the stories of abuse and spousal murder in the news and ask why didn’t they just walk away but Victoria shows through her experiences just how hard it can be and how manipulative the abusers are. It’s telling that even after the attempted murder she didn’t realise the danger she was in and even after the police found evidence of what he did and charged her husband, she still shows just how difficult it can be to break the spell.

I also think it’s important to look at how the media obsession and public's comments on the case had such an impact on her life and made an already difficult experience that much harder.

Favourite Quote:

"Emile had driven me to a point where I didn’t even recognise myself any more. The woman I used to be would have stuck up for herself, would have got out of a relationship that was so clearly toxic. The woman I was now had no confidence that she could look after herself, let alone her children. His constant lying and the fact I had never dealt with it made me feel weak. His infidelity made me feel totally worthless."

Comments

Mint and Murder by Carly Winter

Rating: Stars Themes: Short Story, Cosy Mystery Thoughts: Thoughts: I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily. I had to read this book, seeing it was available, after reading Pipers Piping and Puppies last year. I did read it as a standalone (it’s not the first time I’ve read a series out of order and likely won’t be the last) I managed to follow along fine although I’m sure I’d have understood the relationship dynamics better had I read it in the correct order. I found the story great and as for the mystery I was guessing myself right the way through until Sam figured it out. Sam is a strong female main character who feels worth investing in so I may have to go search some more of the Heywood Herbalist series out. I enjoyed seeing Sam interact with her friends as they had great chemistry and it felt real, and also really liked Sam’s interactions with Doug as it added another layer of humanity to her and reality to the town. I would love ...

Shame-Sex Attraction by Lucas Wilson

Rating: 4 Stars Themes: Non-Fiction, LGBTQ+ Thoughts: I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily. This is definitely a difficult read and it took me quite a while to get through it for that very reason. It is split up into 17 different peoples experiences with a foreword and afterword. It’s definitely an important read for many as these practices are still legal in many countries, including my own, and without knowledge of the damage of the practices many may not join in the protests or sign the petitions to try to get laws in place. As a member of the community myself I found some of these stories such as the ‘Sniffing the Gay Away’ and ‘Convert’ especially difficult to read and reminded me just how lucky I was to have such a supportive and loving community around me. I appreciated that the afterword highlighted the limitations of the collection such as having little to no religious, geographical or racial diversity but that they did try to ga...

Porn is Not Sex Ed! by Jessica Melendez

Rating: 3 Stars Themes: Non-Fiction, Young Adult Thoughts: I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily. In the age of lessening sex education this book could be a great tool to help bridge the gap. I appreciate the talk to an adult bits that can encourage children to start to have conversations that are important but they often think are cringy. The note to trusted adults bit at the end is great too and there’s quite a few useful activities to help the messages really sink in. Some of the points here such as fetishisation and body image are really important ones that I never learned that young (which could be the reason I had such poor body image as a teen) and for the most part the book talks to kids on their level although some areas may feel a little immaturely worded for older teens. With thanks to Hachette UK and Netgalley for my advanced digital copy of this book.

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