I Survived by Victoria Cilliers

Rating:

5 Stars

Themes:

True Crime, Coercive Control, Non-Fiction, Memoir, Abuse, Biography

Thoughts:

This can be a difficult read at sometimes but is a critical book for anyone who wants or needs to understand coercive control and abusive relationships. It’s all too easy for us to see the stories of abuse and spousal murder in the news and ask why didn’t they just walk away but Victoria shows through her experiences just how hard it can be and how manipulative the abusers are. It’s telling that even after the attempted murder she didn’t realise the danger she was in and even after the police found evidence of what he did and charged her husband, she still shows just how difficult it can be to break the spell. 

I also think it’s important to look at how the media obsession and public's comments on the case had such an impact on her life and made an already difficult experience that much harder. 

Favourite Quote:

"Emile had driven me to a point where I didn’t even recognise myself any more. The woman I used to be would have stuck up for herself, would have got out of a relationship that was so clearly toxic. The woman I was now had no confidence that she could look after herself, let alone her children. His constant lying and the fact I had never dealt with it made me feel weak. His infidelity made me feel totally worthless."